Being a Pisces, I feel that I live in a state of perpetual vulnerability. I yearn to connect with people I meet, wanting to be open and genuine. I don’t really enjoy small talk, like talking about the weather. Instead, I love to create a bond with people, to get to know who they truly are, to understand what makes them tick, where they might feel stuck in their lives, and how they can be guided to find their peace and happiness. I have realized that it’s hard for me to separate my professional life from my personal life, and that there are many people afraid of being badly hurt by choosing to be vulnerable.

 Let’s ask Webster Dictionary for the definition of vulnerability:

It is the quality or state of being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed, either physically or emotionally.

As the definition states clearly, being vulnerable offers the possibility of danger and hurt. So, the question to ask ourselves is the following: do we need to avoid it at all costs, or is it worth giving it a try? Vulnerability: friend or foe?

Vulnerability as a Foe

In professional settings, vulnerability is not always the best thing to show because it can be perceived as a weakness. When we admit to mistakes, uncertainties, or limitations, we risk losing credibility or respect, especially when dealing with competitive environments. Similarly, in social situations, when we decide to reveal too much personal information, it can result in judgment or exclusion. My recommendation, if we want to avoid this predicament, is to learn how to navigate these contexts by finding a delicate balance. We must weigh the potential benefits of vulnerability against the possible risks to our reputation and relationships.

Vulnerability as a Friend

I believe that one of the most powerful aspects of vulnerability, is its ability to foster deep emotional connections and bonding. When we feel ready and willing to open up to others in a genuine way, by sharing our true selves, our fears, and our aspirations, miracles happen. We also give permission to other people to do the same.

I became aware that embracing vulnerability is essential for personal growth and that it’s not something we look forward to doing. It requires stepping out of our comfort zone and facing uncertainties and challenges head-on. Yes, it’s true that this process can be uncomfortable and even painful, but it is through these experiences that we have the opportunity to develop resilience and a deeper understanding of ourselves. By confronting our fears and insecurities, we can and will overcome obstacles and emerge stronger, more confident, and more capable of handling future adversities.

In my book “Victim to Victorious (https://shorturl.at/jwuiZ) I had the courage to share my personal story, which helps my clients trust me and know that I can help them the way I helped myself, using breakthrough strategies, techniques, and my ability to be strong, courageous, confident, and victorious.

Another very important situation where vulnerability is a must is in friendship and romantic relationships, where it creates a sense of trust and intimacy that is difficult to achieve if we decide to have superficial interactions instead. I also want to add that if you are ready to make a commitment to someone you love, you need to find the courage to share your personal story, to talk about the challenges and traumas that you experienced in your childhood. This, in turn, helps the other person accept you more, develop more understanding and compassion, and realize that the emotional responses the person might at times display have nothing to do with you! What a relief to understand that, don’t you think?

Let’s not forget the realm of creativity and innovation, where vulnerability is a crucial component. Let’s face it, it’s not easy for artists, writers, inventors, and entrepreneurs to expose their ideas and creations to the scrutiny of others. The exposure is daunting, as it opens them up to criticism and failure. However, it is precisely because of their willingness to be vulnerable that breakthroughs and novel ideas are possible in the world we live in. It is when we are not afraid to take risks and make mistakes that we are able to push the boundaries of what is possible and achieve remarkable feats. I want to use myself as an example. In my 20s, when I came to America, I became a binge eater and put on so much weight! Finding the courage to admit to myself that I was a binge eater forced me to go on a quest to find the solution for my healing, which I did. I have subsequently devoted my life to sharing these unique strategies and techniques that I developed to deal with this problem to help others do the same.

I believe that with time and by gaining knowledge of who we truly are, we can reach an understanding and balance between when to be vulnerable and when not to be. The more we develop healthy boundaries and know how to protect ourselves and feel safe within, the more we can trust in our intuition and allow it to guide us on our path to Victory and Joie de Vivre.

« Vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage. Truth and courage aren’t always comfortable, but they’re never weakness.»

- Brené Brown

Stay tuned for the next Victory News: The Art of Seduction.

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